Dangerous females of the metropolis

Years ago I went to the London Eye. Security waved me straight through. They thought a young mother with a child in a buggy cannot possibly be a dangerous person. Ha, how wrong they were. Mothers are seen as innocent and good people. They will care, look after us and soothe us to sleep. Beware of this mindset.

Mothers are extremely dangerous, and I am not talking about your mother in law. She is usually harmless. I am talking about mothers with kids between baby age and i hate you age. Those women you need to be afraid of. They suffer from serious sleep and sex deprivation. Not a good combination. If you want to stay alive, don’t cross them.

There is only one person more dangerous than the mother and that’s the teenage daughter. She will have a bitch switch. Cute and helpful one minute and evil and psychopathic the next. She is the female assassin. Make sure she does not know about your life insurance. There are new jeans in TopShop. She will want your money, mascara and bag. In that order. Don’t walk in front of her. You will accidentally fall down the stairs and mysteriously disappear. Her female friends will help her get rid of your body.

#letmeoverthinkthat #bitchswitch #teenagedaughter #mother #observationsofthemetropolis #felicityfauxpas

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Felicity

Lifestyle blogger sarcastically commenting on observations in the Metropolis. Overthinking and introverted.

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